How You Can Look Your Best at a Dinner Party

You got an invitation to a dinner party. Now what to wear. It’s a good question! And there no one sentence answer because it depends on many things. This post keeps you covered to create the right look on that evening’s dinning party. Read what to wear at a dinner party.

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Updated: 10/2021

Don’t Sweat What to Wear at a Dinner Party

Dinner Party Invitations – whether at your boss’, a friend’s or colleague’s house or in a restaurant – are those in between dress-up and casual social events that are hard to dress for. While how to dress for a BBQ or the dress code for a cocktail party are straight forward casual and dress-up, respectively, the dinning-party dress code seems to be neither fish nor meat to many of us. You will have to strike the balance to feel comfy, appropriately dressed for the event, respectful, look to your best, and to have a great time. Sounds like squaring the circle?

Attention: Dress-code Theme

First make sure that the hostess/host has not planned a theme. If so, you are out of the salad! You just have to find something that matches the theme. Take a look at what you have in your closet that you could wear and accessorize to fit in. I wrote a post about how to shop your closet for costumes a while ago.

If there is no theme, your goal should be to go for something fashionable, but not too trendy.

Who Should Wear What at a Dinner Party

Dinner parties are a good opportunity to wear that shrunken blazer or embellished cardigan, or flowy dresses (e.g. panels 2, 5, 6). Unusual colors (panel 4), wild patterns (panels 2, 6) or cuts fit the bill (panel 5). In warm climate or summer, go for slouchy silky pants or tops. However, make sure to have only one slouchy item. Otherwise, you would land in frumpy territory. In colder climate regions or winter, silk and/or cashmere knit tops and heavier fabrics like jersey or gabardine (panel 3) or even white denim (panel 1) are in order.

In the European Alps or Scandinavia, wearing a cotton or wool dirndl is always appropriate for a dinner party (panel 8). Stay away from a linen dirndl. It may wrinkle when sitting at the table. If you are an immigrant, wearing an everyday item/outfit according to your heritage (panels 7, 8) like a lice jacket,  kimono, janker, Baro’t Saya, cheongsam,  dirndl, lederhosen, saree, mantilla, peineta, lodden boots, bombachas pants, baiana dress, or even a traditional Irish cableknit sweater will be appreciated by nearly everyone. Such an outfit is an ice breaker, especially, when there are people you never met before. Panels 9 and 10 show examples of winter outfits.

When you like such tips and outfit recipes like in this post and the photos above, and you want them for all kind of dressing situations then buy my style recipe book How to Dress for Success in Midlife.

Here are some nice outfit inspiration photos for dinner invitations year round. When you get an invitation in summer, make sure whether it’s a grill party. In that case, it’s better to dress for a BBQ than for a sit-down event.

Are you the more girly girl? What about a midi or longer chiffon dress with a motorcycle vest or jacket, or a long lace dress with a denim jacket (panel 5)? A fit-and-flare dress with (panel 3) or without cardigan (panel 9) is a great option in winter.

Stylist’s Dinner-party Dress-code Tips

Avoid anything too festive, especially, when the party is at a home, not at a restaurant. You do not want to out-dress your hostess who runs back and forth between the kitchen and the dinning table! Unless she has a maid who prepares and serves the dinner, she will not wear something too fancy due to the risk of spilling and ruining it.

Pro tip: When the meeting is at a restaurant, keep the (unwritten) dress-code of that place in mind when putting your outfit together.

In an Alaska roadhouse, for instance, anything chiffon would be out of place in winter.

Have Fun Accessorizing

Dinner parties are your Card Blanche to accessorize with cocktail rings, chunky necklaces, layered necklaces, or an oversize scarf. But please only one of these pieces at a time! See for instance this guide how to up your style with scarves. Since you are sitting at the table, statement earrings are better than a statement belt. See this guide on which earrings are best for your face.

Shoes Can Make or Break your Style

The type of shoes should be picked with the vibe of your outfit in mind. Thus, nearly everything not too casual and not too fancy works. For instance, wedges, strappy or beaded sandals with no to a little heel, cut-out ballet flats, even booties are great if they fit to the other items of the outfit style- and color-wise.

Switch your bag. Leave your dress bag, work bag or backpack at home! Add a not too large clutch or other fancy bag matching the vibe your look.

In winter, bring a pair of slides, mules or flat-outs so you won’t have to wear your tall boots or walk in your socks or tights inside the house. It’s just polite courtesy not to spill your host’s carpets with snow splash or wet footwear. Of course, bringing a pair of shoes requires a larger bag than a clutch. However, whether or not you have to bring shoes, your bag should clearly be outside the territory of black tie or work tote. See the bags shown below as examples. They meet the bill.

This clutch is great bag for a dinning invitation to carry the essentials of makeup, keys, and cell phone

This orange Bellorita fish satchel is large enough to hold your keys, phone and a pair of slides to wear inside the house

Further Dinner Outfit Suggestions and What Else to Think about

The panels above show some dinner outfit ideas. What about skinny white jeans with a silky, slouchy print top, floral cardigan or blouse (panel 1)? What about slouchy printed pants with a silk tank top and a cropped jeans jacket? Don’t wear wide leg or palazzo pants, when it is the first time you are invited by this host. You want to know that you will not have to take off your shoes! Pants cut for plateau shoes become a hazard without them!

That is also true for any pants and jeans cut for heels.

Stylist’s tip: When the party takes place at a friend’s house in winter, make sure that your outerwear can take it that the host/ess throws every coat just onto their bed. Very Alaskan. In other words, you should be able to stick your gloves into the pockets of the coat, and the scarf and hat into its sleeves.

Dress for Success: Dinner Party Does and Don’ts

• Wear something related to the theme for a theme party. See this guide how to shop your closet for a costume.
• Don’t outdress the hostess.
• Bring a thoughtful gift.
• In rainy or snowy weather, bring a pair of shoes to wear in the house to not spill the carpet.
• Keep the location in mind.
• Keep your relation to the hosts in mind. If it’s your boss don’t go wild with your look and accessorizing.

Dinning Invitation Courtesy

Well, two last things. What ever you wear, make sure it will not make you feel uncomfortable when you are “forced” to over-eat 😉 . Bring a little thoughtful gift for the hostess. Last, but not least, remember the end time that was given on the invitation. You don’t want to be the guest who is told it is time to go.

Enjoy the food, compliments, and evening in style!

Photos: G. Kramm

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